


All Light is Star Light

by deathgurgle



Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-11-04
Updated: 2013-11-04
Packaged: 2017-12-31 13:10:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 666
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1032076
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/deathgurgle/pseuds/deathgurgle
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sebastian is tired of running.</p>
            </blockquote>





	All Light is Star Light

**Author's Note:**

> Note that yes, this is brain trauma Jim.

He calls him James because he can’t stand to call him what he used to. Running away from the British government is difficult when one has a grown man with the mental capacity of an eight year old to drag along after he put a gun in his mouth. It’s difficult to explain to him why they have to leave so suddenly and leave nearly everything behind. It’s worse when he throws a fit. But no matter what, Sebastian always brings him -keeps him safe. James is never alone.

He’s not dumb, he can still do calculus in his head and pick locks and use a mobile with ease. Yet, he struggles with tying shoes or buttoning his shirt and Sebastian has to help him every time. But he always does. The one thing, though, that’s the easiest for James to do is looking at the stars and constellations. Sebastian managed to nick a few books on galaxies and space while traveling from one place to another and he’s often got all of them spread about him on the floor of whatever grungy flat they’re in, tracing the shapes with his fingers and naming them even without the labels.

The books are nothing compared to the real things, however, and Sebastian always takes him up on the roof of the building they’re living in at the moment just to give James a better view of the infinite space above them. From memory he can point out dozens of constellations and tell Sebastian about them even though all he’ll ever see is white dots and black and nothing more. He stays there with him for hours, listening to him yammering off their names and pointing to a cluster. And he nods as if he understands, and he wraps an arm around James with his thumb gently rubbing his arm.

Eight times they’ve fled from the government, running from flat to dingy flat just to avoid being caught and sentenced to prison or death or whatever else they’d do. They’re closing in though, and Sebastian knows it with a painful certainty that this time could be their last if they didn’t leave soon.

He misses Jim. He misses him to the point of physical pain and he’ll never get him back; all he’ll ever have now is James. He misses his old job working for him, the shags, and he misses his mind. No one, not even Jim himself, misses Jim Moriarty’s mind more than Sebastian Moran. He just misses. He’s tired. He’s tired of taking care of himself and James, he’s tired of running, and he’s tired of living. He takes James’ hand.

“Y’wanna go look at the stars, James?” he asks with such a soft voice he’d never use around Jim. And James nods, pulling Sebastian behind him as he nearly bolts up the stairs to the roof of their newest building.

They sit on the very edge twelve stories up and their feet dangle above the ground so high up that Sebastian starts to feel dizzy until he feels a tug on his shirt by the man beside him, gesturing to the void above. “Ursa Major; that’s the ‘Great Bear,’ remember?” His arm moves and he points to another batch of stars. “There’s Perseus; the hero. You’re like a hero, Sebastian.”

He looks into James’ eyes and they’re dark like the infinite black background above them and he can see the lights of the city below twinkling in them but he pretends they’re stars because all light is star light. Sebastian nods, tears welling, and he can hear the sirens in the distance and _knows_ they’re coming for the two of them. The two most dangerous men in London make quite a catch. He’s tired of running from them and he just smiles at James. He takes his hand into his own and grips it tightly. Sebastian will never let go of that hand until the day he dies.

He pushes himself off the ledge.


End file.
